the final round

August 30th, 2019...a day that was unexpected and unplanned, now stands as one I'll never forget.

My friend, Chris Lee, was getting married over Labour Day weekend. Chris had planned a golf tournament for the 30th, with all of his close friends. So needless to say, I had that date circled on my calendar for quite some time. 

Ashley and I planned to spend the weekend partaking in wedding festivities. After all, Dan and I had spent so much quality time together in the previous months. We also played two rounds together earlier in the summer. One in Montana on my bachelor party (Dan coordinated the whole weekend for the 20 of us). We also played a few days prior to my wedding in New York. 

But from the time Dan celebrated finishing chemotherapy in June, standing as my best man in July, to this glorious August day, things had changed.

The cancer was back...

Dan, Jocelyn and Windsor decided they needed a mental break. They were heading up to Canmore for the week to recharge. Naturally, we decided to change our plans to join them. We set out to meet them on Saturday...Dan and I were going to play at Stewart Creek, and then we would spend the night with them in Canmore. But our round of golf almost never happened.

Just weeks earlier, Dan suffered an aggressive seizure. He dislocated his shoulder and could hardly raise his arm. "So what?" I figured. We're going to have a great visit with them, we don't need to play golf...it's all good.

I told Dan to cancel the round but he had other ideas. "I don't care how much it hurts, we're playing". I assumed he would come to his senses a few days before we played, and realize he just couldn't do it.

Dan spent those next weeks icing, rehabbing, trying to get some range of motion. We checked in daily, and the message was consistent, "We're playing, T".

You know those summer days when you look at someone and say "if every day was like this...I would never complain". August 30th was one of those days. 20 degrees, not a cloud in sight, no breeze.... As we started our day on the range, it was very apparent that Dan was in pain. Every swing looked excruciating, and his balls weren't traveling far. I told him we should just head back and see the girls, no point in playing through pain, there will be another time, another round. But that option wasn't on the table for Dan.

We tee'd off. Naturally, Happy Gilmore was quoted on nearly every hole. We talked about his cancer, his desire to get back to work, and more notably, he gushed about Windsor and Jocelyn. 

But back to the important details of a round between best friends (and worst enemies on the golf course). Who won?

All of Dan's close friends know these two unwritten rules of his golf etiquette:

-DO NOT act cocky at any time

-DO NOT show pity for him if he's playing poorly

Well, I did a bit of both....and sure enough, it caught up to me. I finished triple, triple, double, double. Meanwhile, Dan parred the last 4 holes. We walked off the 18th green with matching scores.

Had you asked me years ago  "If you and Dan knew you were playing your last ever round together, what would you want the outcome to be?" Well, I wouldn't necessarily want to win... but no part of me would want to see him win. 

But a tie...that would be fitting. 

So many people have shared with me what they cherished most about Daniel. His humour, his quick wit, his sarcasm, his modesty...and above all else, his friendship. I think that's what was so special about golfing with Dan...it was a true showcase of all his wonderful and endearing qualities all wrapped into one round, 4 perfect hours.

It was far more than our final round of golf. It was an afternoon where for a moment, everything just seemed to fall into place.

An afternoon I'll cherish forever. 

T.